101 Ways to Transform Your Life : Thought 10

Thought 10 : Grievances bring turmoil, communication brings peace.

Grievances arise from failed expectations. Most of the times we fail to see things ‘As It Is’ in absolute reality. Until this insight dawns a realization, a self – realization which goes beyond the dogma of life and / or opinions based on experiences of self and others, grievances will in turn exist.

Unless these are embraced with maturity and accepted, they initiate a self talk. This self- talk that most of the times is not very appealing, healthy or encouraging and is an absolute spiral down. ‘Spiral down’ means it causes a ripple effect that creates more negativity, more misery within the mind. This eventually acts as great food for the mind to carry on the cycle of misery. This cycle takes one far away from the truth and joy that every moment carries within it.

The best and the easiest way to ensure that not more food is given to the mind to carry forward this misery is through the tool of communication.

When one learns to accept these grievances just as an occurrence or an event by itself, and detach the emotions from the very object that caused it, communication becomes the next step. Now the purpose of communication is not to blame the object or person but to resolve it. It now aims at addressing the issue and not the person.

On humbly accepting this, the intent of the communication is embraced with grace. This enables one to overcome the situation with so much less damage.

This is so beautifully said by none other than Rumi that,


 When one starts having faith in this premise of existence then; no grievance is big enough to overpower one’s mind and get its firm grip in the memory cell of one’s being. It then, just becomes a passing moment in one’s life as if it was just a wave that had to cross to move towards its destination / shore.

So when you find yourself caught in storm of grievances, just accept it as a passing wave. This will help you calm down from within only to respond / communicate with more grace and see it as just another occurrence in the sky or the universe to that you have been a witness.

Be a witness to your grievances and make communication your tool to help you bring that peace within.

May the grievances that occur in your life act as the riding wave for you to reach and cross over to the banks which is blessed with eternal peace!

(I have immensely learned from the teachings of Dr. Wayne Dyer and I still do. These writings are my tribute to his teachings.)

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